Wish upon a star
by Sternenkind1750
Summary: What if the wish Hotaru made at the end of Sailor Stars was to experience a normal childhood for once?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N:** Since I loved Sailor Moon very much as a child, I watched it again recently, reread the Manga and found myself drawn into the story again. And rewatching it, this little idea came into my mind. I hope very much that no one gets offended or upset by it since it involves character death. It's quite Michiru-centered and will not be too long I guess, maybe two more chapters. Also, I am not a native English speaker, so there will probably be a couple of mistakes.

I would be very happy to get some feedback, in particular constructive criticism is very welcome :)

**Disclaimer:** Obviously, Sailor Moon belongs to Naoko Takeuchi etc.

* * *

„A shooting star!"

„What did you wish for?"

„That's a secret. And you, Setsuna?"

"It's a secret."

"That's not fair!"

(…)

"And what did you two wish for?"

"There is nothing we wish for, this is our happiest moment, isn't it, Haruka?"

"It is."

~o~o~

Maybe she should have wished for everything to stay as it was, Michiru thought three months later, as she looked down onto the hospital bed in which Hotaru lay.

The girl's face was pale and haggard, the lips chapped and cracked open. She looked as though she had been ill for months, even though it had only been a little over a week since the child had been sent home from school with a light fever. That's when it had started. At first they had thought it was a mere cold and had put Hotaru in bed, but it had worsened day by day. And now…

She forced herself to look away from the many needles and tubes which stuck in Hotaru's frail little body and felt her stomach clench painfully.

Nobody knew what ailed the girl. The doctors were not able to find anything. And even Ami and Mamoru who had finished his medical studies by now couldn't find any cause for the illness, even though they spent every minute researching and hardly got any sleep.

They were lucky to have been admitted at all into the hospital room, Setsuna, Haruka and her, as they were no relatives. In order to finally be allowed to stay, they had had to appeal to Ami's mother for help.

A few steps away Setsuna and Haruka were discussing silently whether they should fetch Hotaru's father so he could see his daughter for what might be the last time. But how were they supposed to explain to the man that the fatally ill twelve-year old girl was the same child as his one-year old daughter whom Setsuna had fetched last year? He had lost all his memories after all...

A small knock caused her to look up. At the window which connected the hospital room with the corridor, Usagi, Mamoru, Ami, Rei, Minako and Makoto were standing.

Usagi's eyes were brimming with tears as she looked at Hotaru, tears which Michiru hadn't allowed herself to cry yet, even though her composure wasn't far from crumbling down. Usagi had appealed several times to her Senshi to allow her to heal Hotaru with the Silver Crystal, but they could not allow their princess to risk her life however much they wished for Hotaru to get well again.

Michiru quickly glanced over at Ami and Mamoru, but both shook their heads dejectedly. No news then. Not that she had expected it. Her mirror showed her nothing but death and Rei's defeated face betrayed that she saw the same in the fire.

Soon a doctor appeared and talked to the group, shaking her head several times. Probably she told them that they couldn't enter the room – as so many times before. The doctors didn't want to take any chances. Even though there was no indication of the illness being contagious, they didn't admit any visitors expect for the girl's three guardians who refused to leave the room anyways.

At last the girls and Mamoru left dejectedly. Ami held her little computer up as she caught Michiru's eyes and tried to smile encouragingly, failing miserably.

~o~o~

Dusk fell and bathed the room in calm twilight. Michiru started, as suddenly a fluorescent lamp flickered and a doctor entered the room. She shuddered and folded her arms to warm herself a little.

Haruka, who had been leaning against the wall, straightened up and came towards the bed, where she took her place behind the chair in which Michiru was sitting. She leaned back slightly when she felt Haruka's hand on her shoulder, seeking comfort in the touch.

"I'm afraid I don't have good news for you", the doctor said and sighed, as she finished examining their adoptive daughter. "Her condition keeps worsening by the hour. I am very sorry, but I don't think she will live to see the morning."

Haruka's fingers dug painfully into her shoulder. "Is there nothing you can do?" she asked and Michru could hear how much she strained to keep her voice calm.

Haruka was probably the only one of them who still truly believed that Hotaru might be saved. Michiru was unable to ignore what the sea and her mirror relayed to her and Setsuna neither appeared surprised at the doctor's words. If the wind told Haruka the same, she fiercely ignored it.

The doctor shook her head. "I don't understand what's happening…I never experienced something like that with a child. It's as though her body has resigned fighting...as though she wanted to leave this world…"

Unconsciously Michiru wrapped her arms around herself more tightly. Wanted to leave? Why should Hotaru want to leave them? Was it her fault? Had it hurt Hotaru more than she had admitted that Haruka and her had pretended to turn against them, to turn against their very own family and took their star seeds?

The door clunked shut as the doctor left the room again. She realized that the warmth of Haruka's hand was missing now and she did not need to raise her head to know that Haruka had taken up her post at the wall again.

„Michiru-mama? Haruka-papa? Setsuna-mama?" All three started, as they heard the small voice.

Hotaru was faintly smiling up at them. The shades under her sunken eyes were even more pronounced under her violet irises and Michiru moved her chair closer to take the pale hand into hers. Setsuna sat down at the edge of her bed and Haruka stepped close to the bed as well, squatting down.

„Hotaru…" Michiru didn't know who of them had spoken; maybe it was all three of them.

The girl looked for a moment into their tired, sad faces and spoke again, although with notable effort. "Please…please don't be sad, I didn't want to cause you grief. All I did was wish for growing up as a normal girl only once, together with Chibi-Usa…I never thought that…"

A coughing fit shook her body. She closed her eyes for a moment and opened them again with difficulty.

„I am sorry … ." And as she closed her eyes this time, they didn't open again.

The machines attached to her little body went mad and immediately two doctors came rushing into the room, probably alerted by the machines. But they were only able to confirm the girl's death.

~o~o~

Michiru did not remember exactly what happened afterwards. A seemingly endless mass of gray days followed, which she spent either shut into the music room with her violin or on the shore.

There hadn't been a funeral, as Hotaru's body had simply dissolved – to the doctor's horror, but only mild astonishment of the Senshi.

Haruka was similarly affected by grief, even though she didn't shut herself in, but rather drove her car as well as her body to so far unknown speed. When Michiru resurfaced from her own world, she felt that she hadn't been far from mourning a second loss, which would probably have hit her even harder.

Setsuna seemed to be able to handle the loss better – fleetingly Michiru wondered whether she knew more about Hotaru's death than she was allowed to reveal or whether she had accustomed herself in the course of the millennia with the tides of birth and death holding her companions prisoner. Still, she spent suddenly much more time guarding the time portal than necessary – she seemed to barely be able to bear being at home and close to her companions.

Only half a year later, when at least a semblance of normality had returned, she came home more often again.

* * *

To be continued.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N:** Thanks a lot for the reviews! :) I hope you'll enjoy this chapter as well. It's still Michiru-centered and I guess this chapter makes it quite clear where this is going.

Again, I am very grateful for any feedback, it would be great to know what you think!

**Disclaimer:** Surprisingly enough still not mine.

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- Four years later -

„I have to go, see you tonight!" Haruka rushed down the stairs, gave her a quick kiss and left the house.

„Have a nice day!" Michiru called after her, as the door clunked shut loudly.

The water boiled and she poured it into the tea pot. She still had half an hour left before she had to leave the house and so she sat down at the table to enjoy her morning tea. Today was a quiet day, she only had an orchestra rehearsal until 3 o'clock.

Since three years she was studying the violin and painting at the Tokyo University of the Arts – an unusual combination, but in case of Michiru Kaioh they had gladly made an exception. However, the double subject also meant that her timetable was mostly quite full – and on top of that she naturally still worked as a violinist and artist. Only now, with her fourth and final year at university starting, her timetable had relaxed a little.

Haruka was studying mechanical engineering at Keio University. Along with her racing which she hadn't quit either of course, her schedule was a full as Michiru's – or even fuller, for while Michiru brought to perfection what she was best at already, there was a big difference in winning car races and learning how to build them.

The other girls as well devoted themselves to their dreams – even though no one knew how much time was left until the advent of Crystal Tokyo. Ami was a medical student at Tokyo University, while Makoto worked as apprentice to one of Tokyo's finest cooks. Rei dedicated herself to the work at her shrine and Shinto teachings and Minako studied dance and singing at a drama school.

Usagi had very halfheartedly started studying political science of all things, apparently believing that this course of study would best prepare her for her role as future queen, but Michiru doubted that she would ever finish it – she wasn't even sure how often she had actually attended the lectures. Instead she occupied her time with working very enthusiastically in a kindergarten and two months ago she had finally married her Mamoru who was a junior doctor now. For the past months she had kept her Senshi busy with wedding preparations and the wedding itself.

Setsuna still lived with them and was studying astrophysics at the moment even though she had been claiming for years that she wanted to start training as a fashion designer soon – recently however her presence at the time gate was almost constantly demanded, she had hardly seen her since the wedding.

She finished the rest of her tea and her stomach clenched painfully. She pulled her legs up to her stomach, hoping that it would calm down again.

She had been feeling unwell for days and wondered whether she should go to see a doctor after the rehearsal today. Since Hotaru had fallen ill and died so suddenly, she had developed a strong aversion against hospitals and clinics, as they reminded her in cruel detail of Hotaru's death and so she had postponed it again and again.

She took her bathing suit and a towel along, as she planned on spending her free afternoon in the pool and finally left the house, taking the subway to the concert hall. Despite everything Haruka had predicted her, she hadn't lost her desire for normality and if all of Tokyo was taking the subway, she was taking it as well.

~o~o~

„Kaioh, Michiru, right?" The nurse entered the information into the computer. „Please take a seat, we will call you in soon."

Michiru nodded and sat down. It was quite a big clinic close to the concert hall where her rehearsal had taken place today. After her upset stomach had forced her to run to the toilet twice during today's rehearsal, she had unhappily at last decided to visit a doctor.

Soon she was called and followed the nurse to the doctor's office.

A middle-aged doctor greeted her friendlily. „You are suffering from nausea, then?" she asked after taking a look at the computer screen, where the nurse apparently had already entered some information. "When did it start?"

„A couple of days…maybe a week?" Michiru replied uncertainly. She hadn't paid attention that closely, it had become worse by and by.

She looked out of the window for a moment, through which warm afternoon sunlight fell into the room, trying to rid herself of the anxiety the clinic caused her.

"Are you constantly feeling sick during the day?" the doctor prompted further. "Ms Kaioh…?"

She forced herself to redirect her attention to her conversation partner. What had she asked? Ah…yes. „No. It keeps getting better and worse all day."

The doctor nodded. „Do you have any other symptoms?"

„No. I am only feeling sick, otherwise there is nothing wrong with me." She wondered whether she would be allowed to leave now. Now that she had described her indisposition to the doctor, it sounded quite trivial…surely she could leave.

However, she was disappointed, as the doctor continued her questioning. „When was you last period?"

Michiru blinked surprised. When had the last time been? She never paid any particular attention to it, it had always been quite irregular… Finally she remembered and replied: "About two months ago".

The doctor nodded and took a note…as though she just found a theory confirmed. Surely she didn't think…?

"But…it is out of the question that I am pregnant", Michiru added quickly.

"Is that right?" The doctor looked at her for a moment. "I still would like to perform a blood test, Ms Kaioh, simply to rule this possibility out and maybe obtain some further results. It might also be an upset stomach, of course, but it is unusual that you have no other symptoms."

Michiru nodded politely, even though she would rather have risen and left the office right away. If she had known this in advance, she would never have gone to see the doctor. This could take hours…

She endured having a sample of her blood taken and then sat down outside again to wait for the results. For one moment she closed her eyes. She didn't sleep well recently and felt exhaustion catch up with her while she waited.

She started as the nurse called her in again. Had she really fallen asleep? Hurriedly, she took her violin case and her bag with her swimming utensils and followed the nurse back to the doctor's office. The doctor motioned for her to sit down at her desk.

„I suppose…I may…offer my congratulations, Ms Kaioh", the doctor started hesitantly. "It seems like you expect a child after all".

Michiru laughed uncertainly. „This is not a very funny joke, doctor…" What nonsense was this?

The doctor shook her head and frowned. „I'm not joking Ms Kaioh. You mentioned before that you believe it impossible for you to be pregnant, may I…Ms Kaioh?"

Michiru shook her head. The room became blurry, the outlines melting away. She gripped the arms of her chair very tightly, in search for support. She couldn't hear properly anymore and noticed vaguely how the doctor called for help. Then she was lifted up from both sides and led a few steps away.

"So, please lie down here, all right?" Two pairs of hands helped her lie down on a narrow bed and put her legs up. She breathed deeply and slowly her vision returned.

She meant to sit up and apologize, but the nurse who was still standing next to her prevented her from doing so. "Please don't sit up yet, Ms Kaioh, we don't want you to faint again".

A couple of minutes later the doctor returned and smiled at her. "Are you feeling better? We'll conduct an ultrasound in order to confirm the pregnancy, before we talk about everything else. Sometimes blood tests may lead to false diagnoses, so let's rather be sure."

Michiru nodded weakly. Of course she already knew that the diagnosis was false – had to be false, but the doctor would most likely only believe her if she saw it with her own eyes.

The doctor prepared the test and then looked intently onto the small screen. The fuzzy black and white structures and spirals held no meaning for Michiru and so she waited patiently for the diagnosis – inexplicably nervous although she knew it was absurd.

„Ah, there we have it", the doctor said. "Here you can see the embryo quite clearly, I think you are probably in the 6th to 8th week." She looked at Michiru for a moment concernedly.

She nodded quietly. Should she tell the doctor that she had to be wrong, that it was impossible what she believed to have found? But both tests had turned out positive – the blood test and the ultrasound… She felt her stomach turn again and forced herself to continue breathing deeply.

~o~o~

When she finally had been allowed to leave – provided with a vast amount of information impossible to ever remember – her legs apparently had followed the way to the pool on their own account, as to her own astonishment she found herself in front of it when she looked up.

Well, she had brought her bathing suit anyways and maybe this was exactly what she needed – a place to think quietly.

The indoor pool was empty, as usually – one of the reasons why she liked coming here so much – but today the water was unable to calm her.

She was still feeling sick and she didn't know whether it was sheer horror or the fact that… she tried to push the thought away, but it proved to be impossible.

Finally she gave up, wrapped herself into a towel and sat down on a small bench at the edge of the pool. She took a few deep breaths and leaned back, pulling her legs towards her stomach to fight the nausea. She laid her forehead against her knees and closed her eyes, but her thoughts didn't stop spinning.

The doctor had to have made a mistake. It was absurd – impossible.

'And what if she didn't?', a small voice kept nagging in the back of her head. Yes, what if not? Two positive tests – and the signals her body was sending…what was happening to her? What was happening to her body?

She had never been with a man in her entire life – or had she? How else should a child form in her womb – if it really existed? She felt herself shaking and wondered vaguely whether she might be cold.

Haruka. She wanted to call Haruka and be taken home and…but…what was she supposed to tell her? What was she going to say? Would she believe that she didn't know what happened? How should her beloved believe it, if she herself found it quite unbelievable? She couldn't go home like this.

But…it simply COULDN'T be. How… a new thought slipped into her mind, even more horrible than the previous one. What if it was a demon, implanted by an enemy? It seemed even more absurd than her first thought and yet... A new wave of nausea hit her and she felt dampness on her knees. Was she crying?

She didn't know how long she had been sitting like this, until she suddenly felt a light touch on her shoulder.

„Michiru?" She lifted her head and looked into the blue, worried eyes of Ami Mizuno.

„Oh…Ami…" Her voice didn't comply and the words came out in a whisper, barely audible.

„Michiru, what…" Ami stopped as Michiru laid her head back onto her knees, unable to deal with the question. She felt warm arms close around her and after a long moment gratefully leaned against her friend.

„Shall I…shall I maybe call Haruka?" she finally heard Ami's hesistant voice.

Michiru shook her head. „No…no, please don't…", she answered softly.

"All right…", Ami said slowly. "I…well then…would you maybe like to come to my place? The pool will close soon and you will catch a cold sitting here like this. I'll make some tea for you, all right?"

Gently, but decidedly she detached Michiru's arms from her legs unto which she was still holding tightly and pulled her into a standing position. Michiru nodded with a vague feeling of relief that someone else took control of the situation and allowed herself to be pulled towards the showers.

* * *

To be continued.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N:** Thank you so much for your reviews! There is one more chapter to go after this one.

Feedback would be lovely :)

**Disclaimer**: Still the same.

* * *

Half an hour later Michiru and Ami sat at a low table in Ami's room. Each had a cup of hot herbal tea steaming in front of her.

Michiru stared at the slowly swirling liquid. Ami was sitting quietly in front of her, taking sips of her own tea.

What now? Should she tell her what had happened?

Of the four inner senshi, Ami was closest to her – even though she liked all of them very much and shared something with each of them – with Makoto she exchanged recipes, with Rei she could discuss her premonitions and Minako was the ideal shopping partner.

But with Ami it was different. It had started with the water senshi being the only one able to hold herself against her – even beat her occasionally – in the water and so they met up from time to time to compete against each other or simply swim with someone who loved the water to an equal degree. And doing so, they soon had noticed how well they went together. They could sit together for hours, sometimes talking, sometimes quietly, often with a book, each lost in her own world. And at the same time they complemented each other very well with Ami's intellect and Michiru's intuition.

"When does Makoto come home?" she finally asked undecidedly. Makoto and Ami lived together as flat mates since they started their studies and had two tiny rooms close to the campus of Tokyo University.

"She has to work tonight, she said she'll be late", Ami replied. She turned to the window and looked outside. Dusk had fallen and Ami's small, sparsely furnished room with her neatly folded futon, the low table, a book shelf, a small wall closet and a desk was alight.

Haruka would worry if she didn't return home soon.

Would Ami believe her? She lifted her cup to take a sip of her tea, but her hands were shaking so hard that she spilled the hot liquid.

"Michiru!" Alarmed Ami took the cup away and hastily pulled her towards the bathroom, where she let cold water run over Michiru's hands.

"For goodness' sake, Michiru… what's wrong?" she asked very softly, while both watched their fast flowing element.

Michiru felt her hands become numb.

"I…I went to the doctor today", she finally said. "The doctor…she told me…that I am with child…" Her voice became quieter with every word and she saw Ami lean closer towards her in order to understand her despite the running water.

Ami's eyes widened and she turned off the water. „With child…", she repeated slowly.

After a long pause she asked "Which tests did she conduct?"

Michiru described it to her and she nodded.

„So…it wasn't planned then… was it?"

„Planned?" Michiru replied confused. „How.."

„Ah well, you know, there are ways to…" Ami made a vague hand movement and blushed.

„Oh...I see". Michiru laughed despite everything and thought that it was just as well that Ami wasn't aiming to be a gynecologist.

She shook her head. "No…else I wouldn't…I don't understand how…"

„Yes, of course", Ami said as she trailed of and looked at her intently for a moment. "Don't worry, we will find out what happened", she then said very firmly.

~o~o~

Pregnant. Michiru Kaioh, of all people, had just told her that she was pregnant and that she didn't know how she came to be so. She was waiting for Minako to come to her with a similar revelation every day – even though in Minako's case the question would not be how, but rather who… . But Michiru?

Her head was spinning with possibilities and she could only guess how Michiru had to feel.

Logic. She had to approach this problem logically. There HAD to be an explanation. She ruled out the possibility of a mistake when Michiru showed her the ultrasound, after they had returned to her room and sat down again.

Usually it wasn't hard to determine how a child came to be, of course – still, in Michiru's case she could neither believe that she would betray Haruka nor that she would behave like this if she had. The usually so well composed young woman looked completely lost. Momentarily she was sitting apprehensively in front of Ami, her hands kneading and straightening the thin fabric of her light blue skirt.

Still, she had to ask.

„I guess, we can rule out the option that slept with a man – willingly or…" she hesitated, but forced herself to continue "…unwillingly?"

Michiru nodded, looking faintly relieved. „Yes, yes, I didn't…I mean, I THINK I didn't, but else, how…" She stopped, a fearful expression taking over.

"Well…" It was not very likely, but still…"What could theoretically have happened, even though I think it is quite unlikely, is that you were drugged and don't remember it."

Michiru's eyes widened and she paled a little further. „Oh…I see."

„I don't think it's likely", Ami repeated reassuringly, "but still…just to rule it out… do you know how far along you are?"

"The doctor said 6th to 8th week", Michiru replied.

"All right", Ami said, thinking through what her professor had said on the matter. "In this period of time, do you have any memory gaps, woke up anywhere and couldn't remember how you came to be there, fell asleep at an unusual place…" As Michiru shook her head, she smiled. "Or even slept alone anywhere anyhow at all? Normally Haruka is with you, isn't she?"

Michiru gave a very tiny smile back. „Well it does happen that I sleep alone, when we cannot accompany each other to concerts or races – but two months ago Usagi's wedding took place after all and we were both here all the time."

„All right", Ami nodded. She supposed that she had covered any biologically natural possibilities – not that she had really believed any of those scenarios to be realistic in the first place. So on to the next step.

„We can rule this out then. This means that only the last possibility remains – we are facing a phenomenon which is not explicable by the rules of biology. I think this is most likely in this case and after experiencing magical transformations, time traveling and seeing people changing their gender at will I find natural science as it is taught at university often quite lacking..." She stopped herself from digressing too far and reverted to the problem at hand.

"What is most important, however, is to determine whether it is of evil or benevolent origin," she concluded. Michiru's face lost color again – she looked paper-white now. Probably she had also thought of this possibility already. Or had she even seen anything? Was that why she was so frightened? A child of evil supernatural origin would certainly be the worst case scenario...

As she didn't say anything, Ami prompted softly "Did you have any premonitions recently?"

She shook her head. „No, there was nothing and I also feel no evil energy or aura. The sea is quiet, as always…" There was a hysterical edge to Michiru's voice.

Ami's thoughts were racing. How could they best determine this child's origin? Well, supernatural forces did require supernatural powers, didn't they?

So she asked "Did you look into your mirror?"

"Not recently", Michiru replied, eyes widening at the thought. She closed her eyes and between her glowing hands the Deep Aqua Mirror materialized.

Ami smiled and nodded. They had Michiru's mirror – and her computer.

She summoned it as well and started typing while Michiru gazed into her mirror. After a few moments a graph of Michiru appeared on the screen and provided her with the required data. And yes – there it was, the child, a tiny embryo as of now, but already clearly recognizable. It was undeniable.

„The computer confirms the pregnancy", she finally said. "The child seems to be perfectly alright, though, there is no data indicating any negative energy or anything unusual at all. It seems to be a perfectly normal child – but of course the computer can't determine how it was conceived. "

To her surprise, instead of looking relieved she saw how Michiru nodded tensely. She was looking into the mirror with a deep frown marring her face. She waited a little longer, until she couldn't bear the tension anymore and asked "Have you seen anything?"

Michiru hesitated and closed her eyes for a moment. Finally she said "The mirror shows me the Small Lady and Hotaru playing together in the garden. Both are toddlers, about one year old. But…they never really had the same age and neither have they played together when one of them was a toddler – as far as I know at least."

„A vision from the future?" Ami wondered. „I know that Usagi and Mamoru hope now that they are married that Usagi will conceive Chibi-Usa soon…but Hotaru?"

She saw a shadow pass over Michiru's face and looked thoughtfully at her still flat stomach. Might this child be…? She had to call Usagi and ask her to take a test.

Alarmed she noticed that Michiru was swaying softly. She was holding tightly onto the edge of the table and had closed her eyes. Her face had lost all color.

„Michiru?" Quickly she got up and leaned over her. „Are you all right? Would you like to lie down for a moment?"

„No, no, I'm fine. I just need a minute…" Michiru opened her eyes with apparent effort and smiled weakly.

Ami shook her head. She knew by now that Michiru could hardly bear to show any weakness – in front of everyone but Haruka and sometimes, but only sometimes also her friends.

She convinced her to lie down and the ease with which achieved this betrayed to her how Michiru was truly feeling. She went into the little kitchen to make some more tea and left Michiru a moment to herself to regain her composure.

Could it be possible that Hotaru was reborn in this child? They had wondered whether the senshi of death and rebirth would find her way back into life again or whether she was only reborn if needed – and it didn't look like that was the case at the moment. And even if she was reborn somewhere, they would hardly learn of it unless she awoke.

Michiru had relayed the girl's last words to her. Hotaru had wished for a normal childhood... And after she had overcome the shock about the girl's death, she understood this desire only too well. Just as Michiru she had felt incredibly sorry that the child, hardly reborn into a new life, had been summoned by duty again. Instead of finally receiving a chance to experience a normal childhood, she had aged about 10 years in one year's time and spent a big part of this fighting.

She had often wondered what this was going to do to the girl. From where was she supposed to take her experiences, her memories, her trust into the world? From her past life, which probably had been even direr?

Even though Hotaru's death had shaken them all, she had been surprised back then how heavily Michiru and Haruka had been affected – more even than Usagi. If Hotaru was to be reborn, she wouldn't be surprised if she chose those who had loved her like their own daughter even without being related by blood in her past life as her parents.

She was uncertain whether Michiru shared her hunch about the child's identity – and whether she should mention it. In no case she wanted to raise hopes which might not be fulfilled.

However, if this child really was Hotaru, she would be thrilled to find out however this worked genetically...

~o~o~

About one hour afterwards Michiru sat quietly next to Haruka in the car and watched Tokyo's sparkling night-time skyline pass by. As there was nothing else Ami and she could find out tonight – visiting Rei tomorrow might be another option – and finding three missed calls by her beloved, she finally had decided that she needed to face Haruka and asked her to fetch her.

Talking to level-headed Ami had helped. She wasn't feeling close to breaking down any more. Ami had even tried to reassure her that telling Haruka was going to be perfectly fine – which she found sweet and a little funny considering the fact that the quiet girl was usually rather terrified by Haruka's short-tempered manner. But she was right of course…with her Haruka wasn't like that. Usually.

Haruka had been quiet ever since they left Ami's place, except for once, on the highway, when she had asked bewilderedly what was wrong and Michiru had told her to wait, for while she had settled on telling her tonight, she was certainly not going to do so while Haruka was driving. Haruka had nodded, but Michiru noted the tachometer rise further. She had debated denying something being WRONG, but she didn't know yet if there was, after all…

A little later they were sitting together in the kitchen in front of a hastily prepared salad. Michiru had poured herself some more tea, trying to calm her stomach which didn't seem to care at all that she now knew the reason for her nausea. She held the cup clenched tightly with both hands and kept her eyes trained on it, unable to look into Haruka's eyes now that they sat facing each other and the time had come to tell her.

But how to begin? What to tell her?

Even though neither had spoken the thought, Ami and she had probably thought the same. This child might be Hotaru. It might – but they had no prove, except for a cryptic picture inside her mirror. But Ami had probably not dared to speak the thought and she neither knew whether to tell Haruka about it. What if it wasn't Hotaru?

She concentrated on the small life inside her and noted to her astonishment a soft glowing. She couldn't place the aura – it seemed familiar, but this might also result from the child being a part of hers. Maybe Rei would recognize it.

She felt Haruka's eyes rest on her and looked up.

„You…aren't eating.", she said quietly.

"You neither", replied Haruka and her eyes narrowed. „Michiru…"

She looked back at her cup and watched the liquid swaying back and forth slightly, put into motion by her shaking hands.

"I…will you promise me to hear me out till the end?" Michiru said finally.

Haruka's eyes widened in surprise, but she nodded.

And so she told her. That she had been feeling sick recently („Do you think I didn't notice?"), that she had visited a doctor today („Oh…I didn't know it was that bad…") and what the doctor had said. At this point her beloved was lost for words and her jaw set, but she nodded mutely and motioned for her to continue. She told her about Ami's logic exercise with which she had narrowed down the possibilities and Haruka chuckled softly.

Some weight lifted off her heart. If she agreed with Ami… She relayed the results Ami's computer had provided tp her and saw Haruka's astonishment about this final prove. Ami's computer did not err. Then she stopped and hesitated. Should she tell her what she had seen in the mirror?

But Haruka was listening to her worriedly, no distrust in her gaze. How was she supposed to keep secrets from her, if she looked at her like that despite her telling her that she inexplicably was with child?

„And I looked into my mirror", she continued therefore, „and there were Chibi-Usa and Hotaru as toddlers, maybe one year old. They were playing in the garden… in our garden", she added surprised in a sudden realization. "And Ami said that Usagi and Mamoru hope that Usagi will soon conceive Small Lady…"

Haruka made a face at the implications of Chibi-Usa's conception. Then her face lit up. "You mean…"

„No. I mean, yes. No, I mean to say maybe…maybe…but…" Michiru's throat suddenly felt very tight.

„I understand." Haruka reached across the table, catching her shaking hands in her own and held them tight. She looked into Michiru's eyes thoughtfully for a moment.

"You know, recently I dreamed quite often about our little princess", she then said slowly. "I…I didn't tell you, because I didn't want to make you sad…Both of us and Hotaru and Setsuna in our house – it was a little like it was in the past, and yet it wasn't a memory...".

"I see", Michiru whispered, wondering if she dared to hope.

~o~o~

This night Haruka held her as tight as she had sometimes done in the past when the attacks were numbering and the enemy drawing closer – expressing her concern for her beloved in words had never been her strength.

And so, Michiru fell asleep reassured despite the thoughts still spinning in her head.

* * *

To be continued.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N:** Thanks for your lovely reviews! I am happy to see that you are interested into this story - unfortunately this is already the last chapter, I hope you are not disappointed. As always, I am very happy about feedback :)

**Disclaimer:** See last chapters ;)

* * *

Rei was sweeping the shrine's courtyard. Summer was drawing to a close and the acorn trees started to turn red.

She glanced towards the stairs. No one there yet.

Michiru had called two hours ago and asked whether she might come by together with Haruka in the late afternoon. She hadn't mentioned what caused the sudden visit… it was rare for the couple to come to the shrine alone. Occasionally she met up with Michiru in order to exchange thoughts in case one of them had had a vision or premonition and of course both of them attended if the whole group assembled at the shrine…but this?

Calmly and methodologically she continued sweeping, almost perfected to meditation.

Finally she heard steps approach, which made her look up from her task and she saw the couple ascend the stairs. Something was off, by now she saw and felt things like this immediately. A certain tension – worry…? Hopefully Michiru hadn't had a vision predicting evil. She was so glad that finally peace reigned and for years neither of them had seen a serious threat – she hoped so much that they would be granted a little more peace.

She put her broom down and greeted them. Together they went inside. Rei offered tea and they sat down at the low table, Michiru kneeling and Haruka cross-legged, like usual. But except for that nothing was like usual, she thought and frowned at the concerned glances Haruka was throwing at her beloved half hidden. Michiru was pale and looked exhausted – was she ill? But it didn't feel like it…

„May I ask what brought you here today?" she finally asked.

„I…" Michiru took a deep breath and her hands closed around her tea cup as if searching for hold. She looked at Rei. "Yesterday I learned that I am with child".

Rei couldn't suppress a surprised "Oh…". So that was it. But how…

Her astonishment must have showed on her face, for Michiru smiled for a moment and continued "Yes, I was surprised as well, as you probably can well imagine. By chance I met Ami and she helped me to gain a little more insight. The child must be of supernatural origin…and we hope that it isn't evil. I feel nothing threatening and Ami's computer neither discerned anything bad." She paused a moment. Haruka moved to put a reassuring hand on the small of her back and her face relaxed a little.

„We – that is Ami, Haruka and I – assume…hope, that it might be Hotaru, for I have seen her yesterday in my mirror and Haruka has seen her recently often in her dreams. But I cannot read the child's aura and…I hoped you might be able to see more…" Michiru's voice broke a little and she stopped, looking at her cup still clenched tightly in her hands once more.

Rei nodded slowly. Hotaru…this would be wonderful. She hadn't guessed anything, hadn't seen – but she had only looked for threats.

The deduction seemed quite likely to her. Haruka usually wasn't particularly clairvoyant, but it would concern her almost as much as it did Michiru and so it might have well been a vision what she saw.

Still, she didn't let her thoughts show on her face, since she guessed how hard it was for both of her friends to allow this thought, this hope, fearing to be disappointed. And if it wasn't Hotaru – where did this child come from?

She moved a little closer to Michiru. "May I?" As she nodded, she lightly laid a hand onto her stomach, closing her eyes. Yes, there truly was a child – she felt the aura. Warm and familiar – no, this certainly wasn't a threat. She looked further, trying to remember Hotaru's aura.

Finally she reached the essence – a warm violet glow, Saturn and Hotaru at once, free of the sadness which had accompanied her so often during her past lives. A smile formed on her face.

She opened her eyes once more and nodded. "You are right, Michiru. This is Hotaru's aura. She truly is being reborn."

Both looked at her speechlessly and she smiled more broadly. "Congratulations."

~o~o~

„…Yes, that's exactly what Rei said. That's just what you assumed, isn't it?"

Haruka heard Michiru's voice quietly come from the kitchen, as she sat down with her laptop on the sofa and opened it. She had yet to read two papers for her seminar tomorrow, a task which she had postponed till the last minute, as so often, and when the telephone had rang a few minutes ago and she had forwarded Ami to Michiru, she decided that she finally had to get to work. Not that she had very high hopes to be able to concentrate onto the finer details of hydraulics at the moment…

Michiru's revelation yesterday and Rei's confirmation today had caught her quite off balance. She had no shortage of experiencing unbelievable things since she had met Michiru and taken hold of her henshin stick, but this surpassed everything in her eyes…even though an unexpected pregnancy would for most couples be surprising, but much more normal than the problems which came with realizing that the magical talismans one had been looking for were to be found in the heart of your beloved and that she would most likely would have to die for it. But of course it was different for them.

Astonishingly, she was utterly but not unpleasantly surprised by the events. There rather was an overwhelming feeling of relief, for she had secretly always harbored a nagging feeling of guilt when she thought of Hotaru. At first she had put all her energy into killing Hotaru and then, later, when she loved her like her own child, she had taken her star seed and with it her life. And only three months after Usagi had saved them all she had really died, of her own will it almost seemed and Haruka had often wondered whether wasn't her fault after all.

But if she returned now, to Michiru and her of all people…then she not only received the opportunity to let her live the childhood she had wished for her and redeem herself, but in this case the girl's death maybe hadn't been her fault after all.

Still, she was glad not to have to carry the child to term herself…

In the time in which they had taken care of Hotaru, Michiru had always been most motherly of them three. And she had confessed to Haruka that she wished to carry a child herself once, not now, but once…a wish that Haruka didn't share, at least at the moment. So maybe it was going to be alright for her beloved.

But still…she shortly thought back to the moment when Rei had confirmed that the child Michiru was carrying was Hotaru. Her face had lost all color and she had all but fainted – luckily she already was sitting on the floor and they were able to lie her down quickly. And last night, when she had trembled in her arms…

She sighed softly, finally opened the folder in which she had saved the papers and started reading – without absorbing any information at all.

~o~o~

„Yes, see you on Sunday, Ami", Michiru said and ended the call with a beep. On Sunday all of them were going to meet up in Yoyogi Park to watch the first autumn leaves and enjoy the last warm days.

She sank down in a chair in the kitchen, laying the phone next to her on the table.

Her head hurt and she slowly massaged her temples, trying to ease the pain. She had another rehearsal tomorrow after classes and an important concert on Saturday…and she had the feeling that the sickness and dizziness were increasing with each day. Maybe it was just stress, not the pregnancy… angrily she wiped a few tears from her cheeks.

"I am sorry, little one, I am so happy that you are coming back to us…it's just all a little overwhelming", she whispered, running one hand softly over her stomach.

And she really was. What a wonderful chance to be able to have a child herself and to have her little princess back at once. But at the same time she felt confused, afraid, not quite ready to deal with all that was happening. What was she going to do with university, with her jobs…what was she going to tell her parents who disapproved already of her relationship with Haruka and would certainly disapprove of a pregnancy she couldn't present a father for?

What if she lost the child? What if she had hurt her unconsciously, not knowing about the little life inside her? Had she drank alcohol recently? She didn't think so, she had lost all taste for it in the past months – and she knew now why, certainly – but still…

"Michiru? Everything all right?" Haruka had come into the kitchen, looking worried. She tried to smile up at her reassuringly and nodded, not trusting her voice.

In a smooth movement, Haruka was by her side and pulled her into an embrace, murmuring sweet nothings to her and rocking her gently. She held onto her, her fear waning, feeling quite comforted and safe. She was having Haruka by her side and that was most important of all.

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The end. :) I wasn't planning to describe the entire pregnancy, but was mainly interested into exploring how they might deal with finding out, that's why it ends here. However, I can safely say that the child is really Hotaru and she is not having twins, I am sorry...again, I hope you are not disappointed with this ending. I have another story in mind that is most likely going to be much longer (and not connected to this one at all), which I'll probably start posting soon :)

Thanks for reading, favoriting, reviewing, following...! :)


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